What does it take to become a Champion?

A few weeks ago, Kai became the ICO English champion in three divisions—winning every fight convincingly. Watching him stay calm and focused throughout the day, and achieve his goals, was a proud dad moment. He reached the top—and did so in style.

After taking some time to reflect, I found myself asking: how did he do it? And more importantly, can it be replicated?

The reality is, nobody walks into competition and immediately wins English titles. Big wins don’t come without losses. Yet too many people give up after experiencing defeat—sometimes after just one loss—never realising their true potential.

To become a winner, you must first learn how to lose. There are no shortcuts.

Kai has had his fair share of setbacks. Last year, he didn’t win a single gold medal. There were silvers and bronzes—but in the biggest moments, he fell short. It hurt. There were tears. There was disappointment.

But what matters is how you respond.

How can you take that disappointment and turn it into motivation? How can you use a loss as feedback instead of failure? That is the difference between those who quit and those who go on to succeed.

Every setback is an opportunity to improve—if you’re willing to face it, learn from it, and come back stronger.

I remember when Kai was winning everything at under 32Kg weight class, dominating all his opponents and then he moved up a weight category. Suddenly everyone was bigger and in the first few fights in the new category Kai struggled. He lost fights. He went to the WAKO British Championship and fought a very good kid and lost convincingly. This kid went on to win the title and later the WAKO World Championship. After that loss Kai turned to me in tears and uttered the words “I am not good enough anymore”.

The truth, as I explained it to Kai on that day, is you don’t stop being good as a result of one fight. There are levels to every game. When you get to the top of one level you then move to the bottom of another. This is how you progress. Sometimes you are the hammer and other times you are the nail.

You may win all the local competitions but when you step up and fight at a big national competition you lose. You can stay in your comfort zone, fighting in lower comps and winning, but you will never get better than what you are now. To be the best you have to compete against the best. Nobody grows in their comfort zone.

Losses are inevitable, but it is how you handle these that is of all importance.

With Kai he always reacts in the right way. After his loss in the WAKO British championship we knew we needed to improve his close range boxing so we put things in place to do just this. After Kai struggled with cardio in the ICO Welsh Open he immediately started going on runs and doing hill sprints.

If you learn from the losses they are more valuable to you then the wins.

Nobody remembers your losses, the wins however stay with you forever.

Michael Jordan, one of the most famous basketball players ever, once said;

“I’ve missed more then 9,000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed”.

So what does it take to be a Champion?

It comes down to one key ability: learning how to deal with losses, grow from them, and refuse to give up because of them.

I truly believe anyone can achieve what Kai has—but it isn’t easy. If it were, everyone would be a champion.

Think of an iceberg. You only see the small part above the surface. That’s the podium moment—the medal around your neck, the photos, the applause. That’s what everyone notices.

But what people don’t see is everything beneath the surface.

They don’t see the extra training outside of classes. The hill sprints while others are watching TV or playing computer games. The discipline to eat well when others are choosing sweets and junk food. They don’t see the losses, the setbacks, and the hard lessons that shape you and sharpen your skills.

All they see is the result—the tip of the iceberg.

Too many people want that result without being willing to do the work it takes to achieve it.

But there are no shortcuts to success.

When Kai moved into his current weight category, he lost badly to a taller opponent. As a parent, it was hard to watch.

A few months later, he faced the same boy again at the CIMAC Open—and lost again. At that point, many would have given up. That would have been the end.

But quitting isn’t in Kai’s vocabulary.

Not once did he say he wanted to stop. Even when the wins weren’t coming, deep down we both knew it was only a matter of time.

Kai kept going. He grew into the weight category, stayed consistent, and focused on one thing—getting better.

Two weeks ago, he faced that same opponent in a boxing match and dominated him. Then, just last week, they met again in the final of the ICO Boxing English Championship—and Kai won convincingly.

The message is clear: great things come to those who refuse to give up.

They don’t always come quickly—but if you keep showing up and putting in the work, they will come.

Steven Bartlett, author of Diary of a CEO, says: “You must out-fail the competition.” He describes failure as high-velocity feedback—the fastest way to improve.

The reality is, Kai has lost more competitive fights than most of the rest of the club put together.

And that’s exactly why he’s now an English Champion.

Because in the end—nobody remembers the losses.